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Don't get me wrong. I like equipment. If equipment is never remade again, I think that would be disappointing. But have you noticed how out of place and unrealistic it is? Not only can you give a guy four pairs of armor, but you can give a dragon or spider armor.

Why can Savannah Lions use Scimitars? It is quite possible to give Savannah Lions twelve or more scimitars! Oh yeah, I guess there might be several lions using scimitars in one card... but so what? It doesn't make sense anyway. You can even equip Dancing Scimitar with scimitars. That's just wrong. And you know it.

Wizards could have made equipment make a lot more sense by saying things like Leonin Scimitar may only be equipped by soldiers. It would also make sense to restrict how much equipment one person can use at a time. How could one person use twelve scimitars, or four pairs or armor?

At least Wizards made sure you can't equip one equipment to multiple people. That would be weird. Strangely enough that ruling was not mentioned on the reminder text for equip, but a couple silly things were: This card comes into play unattached and stays in play if the creature leaves play. Why is that worth mentioning? The fact that people would assume that a card has more rules than is mentioned on it is silly. Might as well also add, When Equipment is destroyed it goes to the graveyard. Someone might assume equipment doesn't without text like that.

Since equipment makes so little sense as it is, we might as well have fun with it. So, to make equipment make even less sense... or at least be more silly, I propose the follwing four equipment cards.

Scimitar of Sharing

Whenever you equip a creature you move the equipment from one creature to another. Why does Wizards define attach as an exclusive activity? I can imagine some equipment as being shared among friends, such as a battering ram or the action figure storage truck. Of course it makes no sense for a scimitar to be shared... but it's a magic scimitar.

Prancing Scimitar

Why can't artifact creatures equip other creatures? I guess it would be kind of silly for an Ensouled Scimitar to be a creature and be used as a weapon by someone without having to attack with the creature. That's why I made Prancing Scimitar. With this new ruling the impossible situation of an artifact creature being attached to another creature also makes them "banded together." That way they have to attack and block together. And you can keep the opponent from killing both the equipped creature and its equipment at the same time. I always liked banding.

Scimitar Scabbard of Majesty

It's also kind of silly that there isn't anything like equipment for non-creatures. There might be some nice artifacts that can help your other artifacts, like the Scimitar Scabbard of Majesty. It makes any Scimitar worth using, and is a great combo with the previous two cards.

Scimitar of Singing and Dancing

The final equipment card I would like to present makes use of the new flip cards that will be introduced in the next Magic: the Gathering set, Champions of Kamigawa. Basically you play it as one card (face up with the mana cost), and sometimes you can spin it to be upside down and transform it into a new card. Scimitar of Singing and Dancing/Scimitar of Hacking and Slashing adds a new dimension to the mechanic by allowing you to transform your creature into an equipment. This would be a lot more fun than Ensouled Scimitar.

Scimitar of Singing and Dancing printouts will be given away this month to the first 9 people who use buy it now in my ebay store. Scroll down and read about my Ebay Auctions for more information.